The Journey of Motherhood through the Sutras of Patanjali

I’ve been thinking about the Journey of Yoga through the Sutras of Patanjali in relation to the journey of motherhood, and I became fascinated with all of the parallels I could draw. Now, I'm writing quickly because I just thought of this before I taught class this morning, so I will come back to refine, but want to share what I have so far. 

As many of you know there are four padas or chapters in the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. Below I relate the four padas to the journey of motherhood:

1.     Samadhi –Meditation - Becoming one with the idea of motherhood.

2.     Sadhana –Practice - Preparing the body for motherhood

3.     Vibhuti –  Powers – Experiencing the power of creating life and the responsibilities that come with that.

4.     Kaivalya – Freedom – Learning to let go

When I began to focus on the eight limbs of yoga.  Once again I could draw parallels. 

1.     Yama - social or moral precepts

a.     Ahimsa – non-violence  

b.     Satya –truthfulness

c.      Asteya – Not taking that which is not given

d.     Brahmacarya – Sexual responsibility

e.     Aparigraha – Avoidance of  unnecessary acquisitions

2.     Niyama - self-disciplines

a.     Sauca - cleanliness

b.     Santosa - contentment

c.      Tapas – deep commitment

d.     Svadhyaya – self study contemplation of spiritual concepts

e.     Isvara pranidhana – surrender and humility

3.     Asana – practice of poses

4.     Pranayama practice of breathwork

5.     Pratyahara practice of detachment

6.     Dharana – practice of one pointed focus

7.     Dhyana – practice of meditation

8.     Samadhi - enlightenment

I realized at every stage of motherhood so far, I could say I experienced a different level of these eight stages of Yoga.  Pre-birth, I had to be good to my body (ahimsa).  I had to be truthful (steya) about what I could and couldn’t do as my body changed. I had to be truthful about what I could and couldn't do as a career woman becoming a mother.  I had to be honest about a lot of changes that were coming. I knew I couldn’t covet things (asteya) like other mom’s lives with the financial means to be stay-at-home moms. I had to be sexually responsible (brahmacarya)  --not only because I had chosen to be married and committed to one man but also for the health of the baby.  I also had to be financially responsible to be able to support a child ( Aparigraha).

Even before my son came into the world, I had to address the ideas of cleanliness (Sauca) of my mind and body, contentment (Santosa)with my changing body, commitment to discipline my thoughts, actions, and diet (Tapas).  As my son was growing inside me, the fears of motherhood began to come to the surface for me to look at and work with (Svadyaya).  I had to surrender to the fact I was gaining 56 lbs and didn’t recognize myself anymore.  I had to surrender to a scary birth that was not at all like I planned.  I had to humble myself to the overwhelming idea of motherhood that only really hits you when you hold that baby in your arms.  And it is at that moment that you find faith.  Faith that something out there, something much bigger than you had a hand in this and felt you were up to the task and therefore faith that you will be supported in your new role ( Isvara pranidhana).

 Once my son came into the world.  Cleanliness became quite a big deal.  Not just with diaper changes, etc., but also with the fact that a new baby is susceptible to all kinds of illness, so I had to make sure I paid special attention to keeping the family and the house clean.  The idea of aligning my thoughts and words began to really take shape.  I couldn’t say cuss words anymore.  They would come right back at me if I did and at the most inappropriate times, “Damn it, Momma, I don’t want to leave.” Yes, the actual words from my son, which were shouted at me, quite loud in fact at the Decatur Library at around age 3.  At the same time, I had to find contentment with what I deemed as failures as a mother.  I had to study myself again and again and re-evaluate myself in relation to my expectations and the reality of the world around me.  Once again, I had to humble myself to my imperfections and surrender to my faith that everything was going to be okay even if I wasn’t the perfect mom.

The other six limbs of yoga came into play pre-birth, birth, and afterbirth again and again, as well.  Our fears get rather pronounced in motherhood. The citta vrittis or fluctuations of the mind can get a little pronounced as well.   Can I get pregnant?  Will I be able to hold onto the pregnancy? Will the baby be healthy?  How in the world is that baby going to get out?  Can I survive the pain?  What if I die?  What if the baby doesn’t make it? Am I grown up enough to be a mom?   How can I function without any sleep?  What if my attention wavers one minute away from him --- he's a toddler and getting into everything? How can I ever let him go into the men's bathroom by himself?  What if he gets kidnapped or lost?  How can I leave him at daycare?  How can I just drop him off at elementary school -- will he make it to class by himself?  What if he gets bullied at middle school?  What if someone breaks his heart?  How will I ever be able to let him drive by himself.  What if... How will...?

Therefore, the practice of keeping the body active, asana, working with the breath, pranayama, detachment, pratyahara and focus, dharna (read happy thought) and finding your center, dhyana begin to cycle again and again and again…every cycle you begin to reach inch by inch a new level of enlightenment:  Samadhi. Through infancy, the terrible twos, the elementary years, the tweens and teens and finally, adulthood. Each new level you learn to “let go” a little more. Until, you learn to let go completely.  Each time you do -- at whatever stage of motherhood you are in (even if you are just learning to mother yourself), you learn that letting go brings you and those you love freedom:  Kaivalya.